As an adolescent many girls feel like once they've messed up they don't have many options. As supported by the Bender article it speaks about 3 girls who were faced with the decision of abortion or child-bearing. The article stated that adoption never even crossed their minds. This made me ask myself, "would adoption be an option for me"? Honestly i cant say that it would, although i respect people who consider adoption and follow through with it, i don't feel as though it would be a decision i could make. It is one of the most selfless acts any mother or father could agree to. How do you feel about adoption? Is it a method that you would consider? If you know people who are adopted, how has this affected their lives? Speaking as a foster child, i would actually consider myself as an adoptee. In my situation the only difference between the two is paper work. I have been apart of the same family since i was six months old and they are the greatest gift that God could have given me. But the fact of the matter is that my life has been greatly affected by the situation i was put in by my parents for many different reasons.
In the Bender reading the girls discussed different pros and cons to what having a baby would bring to their lives. in my opinion personally i feel as though when it comes to having a child, although you cant tell a woman what to do with her body, i dont think that the decision should be made off of things like what other people will think about you if you did become pregnant. Many of teen moms and women in general feel as though having a child will allow them to become closer with the child's father. Also outside influences play a major role in decision making, such as peer input and family input. what do you think is the biggest contributing factor when dealing with decision making in regards to pregnancy?
To shift thought a little, in class we discussed the idea of bad parenting. What do you think makes a person a bad parent? What do you think makes an individual a good parent? Although parenting is subjective, there are certain things that a parent is required to do to ensure safety and responsibility for a child. The things we discussed in class had to do with health, safety, and discipline mainly and there seemed to be mixed opinions about these different topics from students in the class. I believe situations involving safety are primary when it comes to parenting, and although i currently don't have children, safety will be primary when it comes to my child. The child did not ask to be here but it still is the role of the parent to protect the child's life and avoid any situations that would cause danger. Another issue is discipline. On one of the slides spanking was mentioned and i happened to be a strong advocate of spanking. I do realize that this form of negative reinforcement does not work for every child, but it instills in them morals and helps them identify between right and wrong. Although they are the ones who ultimately have to chose between the two, they are still cognizant of the consequences of their decisions. How do you feel about spankings? How will you correct your child's repetitive wrong behavior? Were you spanked growing up? what ways were you punished? What forms of disciplined worked best for you as a child? And which forms do you feel are most effective overall?
J'Quana Brown
Adoption is not an easy choice to make when it comes to your child. You are giving your child away and basically not taking part in the most important moments in its life. I feel as though if I were to get pregnant and carry a child for nine months there is no way Im giving it away. Adoption however, can be a good choice depending on the parents situation if they feel like they would not be able to care or support it or "fit" enough to be parents and would rather bless a couple with it. The biggest factor in decision for me would have to be asking myself whether or not I can financially support it and still be able to keep myself on track enough to make sure it does not ever need for anything. Will I be able to take care of it and give it a good life and guide it right are factors as well. A bad parent is someone I consider someone who is not there for their child emotionally and mentally and didnt support them financially for their own selfish reasons cause I believe money can be tight at times. But if you do not show you child your there for them and or love them and guide them your basically letting the society and environment round them raise them and that is not good cause then your child will grow up to be an unfit person most likely. Spanking is not a bad thing in my book. From experience I feel as though it disciplines the child from right and wrong but it comes down to what type of spanking is ok and not. I was spanked growing up and it disciplined me pretty well. Ways I was punished was spanking, not being able to watch television and not being able to go out and play with friends. I feel like the spanking form of discipline is pretty effective in most cases.
ReplyDeleteVictoria H.
I would like to think that I would be able to give up my child for adoption but in all honestly I think I am too selfish to give up a child that has been growing in me for more than even a day. I think adoption is a great resource for those who are able to follow through it. I feel that now I'm at an age where I could take care of a child to a better extent than I would while I was in high school. Ideas of what your future holds, your support system, and overall expectations of life will effect your ability to give a child up for adoption.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I have the room to judge what makes a good parent because every situation is different. I think that being able to provide and love your child are the most important but being understanding and able to guide your child. I think part of parenting is making things up as you go. No one should EVER hit their child. Yelling is understandable, just because you've become a parent doesn't mean you're not a human. I think time outs and explaining things. Punishment in the moment but reflecting back on the situation after everyone has cooled down I find works really well with my 10 year old brother. But I'm hoping to never have to spank my child. I think it more scares your child more than teaches them the reason why what they did was wrong.
Jean Carr
First off....from having a child at a very young age I feel like I can kind of tell you my personal experience of being pregnant and the choice I made. But remember it is just my personal experience, not everybody.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I was scared out of my mind. I thought of all the options meaning Abortion, Adoption, Parenting. Although, I was raised against Abortion, I admit I still called Planned Parenthood and asked about it, but because I was underage, I would have to have my parents signature, which was not going to happen, my mom definitely wouldn't sign! So abortion was out of the question. Next adoption and Parenting. Well I was planning on giving my child as a gift to a family who couldn't create such a blessing of a child. I knew I had to go to college, whether I had a child or not. So I thought adoption would be the best option, but here again my mom was absolutely against, and still is. It is still a heated disagreement between us today. She thought he would be put in a terrible home and have a terrible life, which is not the cause. Adoptive parents have to go through so many hoops that I feel like they actually prove to the government that they will be good parents. And the father of my son was "supportive" with the fact that he would go with whatever decision that I made. But he wasn't really supportive in the fact that whenever I talked about hypothetical questions of parenting or adoption, he didn't really talk about it. So it was me that had to make the decision. After talking to my mom she said that she would make sure that I went to college and help raise Zion, my son. So although I still thought about adoption I didn't really have a lot of support for that option, so the next option was parenting.
I don't want you to think that I didn't want to parent my child, I did but I did think about all the options, unlike all the 16 & pregnant women. I knew that I wasn't an idiot so I could parent and be a good parent. I will say it is extremely hard to parent but it has so many everyday joyous moment that keeps parents so in love with their kids.
Maegen Hahn