So, lets lay out the facts. I'm a white, blonde haired, green eyed, Christian woman. I haven't been through the troubles of discrimination due to anything except, maybe, occasionally not being allowed to play with the boys growing up. I didn't have a child at a young age nor do I have any facial deformity that makes people look at me when I'm in a crowd. Yet, even though I'm so very BLAND I still fit into stereotypes; I'm a daddies girl, say like every other word, love mayonnaise and, like most white people, like to think of myself as unique and a "non-conformist".
So those are the facts. I'm fine with those stereotypes but I have a HUGE issue when they are directed at other people. Now let me tell you a story, one of my good friends is black and baby sits for her cousin. She has baby sat for him since we were 15. Ever since she started taking him to the park people would give her mean looks or ask how old her son is. When she would tell them it's her cousin they were genuinely surprised. I baby sit for kids all the time and I've only had someone give me a weird look probably one time and I've never had someone ask me if they were my kids.
Why do you think as a society we are so quick to jump to the conclusion that because someone is of a different race then just boring the Caucasian they would have a child? Do your opinions change when you see a young Mexican mother versus a young white mother? Are you less surprised?
Who do you think is more "fit" to raise a child? Or, does it depend on the person rather than their race?
This brings me to my second topic. What environment do you typically expect the teenage mother was raised in? Do you think that a supportive environment is more or less helpful to raise a child? Jenelle's mother was very supportive taking the child completely out of her daughters care. Jenelle stop expecting to have any responsibility even when her mom asked for help with Jace. On the other hand when Kailyn went to talk about schooling in her episode she talked to a fellow teen mother who said her parents had disowned her when she was pregnant but Kailyn's tour guide said it was for the best. Is there a middle ground where the teen can still be a child but be a parent too? What would this look like? How much freedom should the young mother get?
If it was your child who was pregnant what type of support, if any, would you give if able?
As a teen what type of support would you want from your parents? From your friends? From the father? Most importantly what do you expect from yourself? Would you chose to keep the child?
Jean Carr
To begin I think that society has been so successful in stereotyping teen mothers and mothers on welfare as everything but the white race that some people naturally connect teen pregnancy with certain races. Yet, most women on welfare are white instead of any other race. I think because of my experience as a teen mother, I learned very fast that anyone does and can get pregnant. I was a white, middle class, girl that got pregnant pretty darn young so I proved that white girls are not exception.
ReplyDeleteI think teenage mothers are raised in multiple environments. The research says that a lot are from lower-economic standings and a lot of their mothers were teen mothers too. But in my situation, my mom was older, I live in a comfortable place and not any huge dysfunction in my family has occurred either. A supportive environment is very helpful for mothers to take care of their children. It is really hard to say what is a good strategy for the amount support given. I think there is responsibility that if mothers/fathers choose to parent their child then they need to step up to the plate and not pass the responsibility onto someone else (namely grandparents). However, parenting is hard and no matter what age or finance situation parents need sometime for themselves, not just for selfish reasons but personal time rejuvenates parents so they can be better parents when they are with their children again. You are constantly struggling trying to be a better parent and it is hard.
Because I was given support from my mother as a teen mom, I feel like I know exactly what support I would give if my son's girlfriend got pregnant at a young age. I kind of think I would be like Kailyn's boyfriend mom. She was supportive to Kailyn in a healthy way I think.
Choosing to parent your child is a very difficult decision to make as it is not just about emotional connection, you need to think about emotional readiness, financial readiness, time commitment, etc. I think only the mother can know the answer, but the problem is there are many social pressures from parents, boyfriend, peers, society, etc. which complicates things even further which isn't fair to the mother that is trying to make a very grown up decision.
Maegen Hahn
I believe the society is so quick to jump when stereotyping african american women having children based off how a percentage of babies being born in this world has been observed to come from a black woman first before a white woman or any other race. I am not surprised at all when a mexican woman gets pregnant but a white woman yes because the society based pregnancy around black women are the first to get pregnant and white women are the ones who have children after college and once they are married. I believe the environment that the girl was raised in was one where less women of her race got pregnant so therefor her reaction to the people at the park was surprising. If my child got pregnant I would support her as much as I can but make sure she learns the tools of caring for her own child. As a teen and If I were to get pregnant I would expect help from the father. I would like to receive help from my mother, friends, and father. I may keep my child it depends on the situation I am in at that time.
ReplyDeleteVictoria H.
When i think of teenage preganancy, i dont think of a specific race of people. i think of a specific type of person from a specific background. I realize that this is a stereotype and i know that it is wrong. When i think of teenage preganancy, i think of a promiscuous teen who may have entirely too much freedom, or not enough freedom. I also recognize that the boundaries that i set in my mind can be and are broken everyday.
ReplyDeleteWhen discussing who is fit to raise a child, i dont think it necessarily has to do with age. Girls are expected to transform into women and take on a motherly role once they have a child. Although the expectations are there, they may not step up like in the case of Janelle. Support does play an important role in a girls transformation into womanhood and motherhood. i believe that support is essential but not at the cost of enabling bad habits that should come second to the child. As a person that supports a young mother, you still have to allow them to make their own mistakes and take the supervisor role without letting things get so bad that the child is now suffering the consequences. In Janelles story, things were spiraling down and her mom took Jace before things got too bad, but the problem was she took on too much responsibility in the first place so Janelle used her and at this point she was more of a hindrance than a help.
I personally think that when one has a child, they no longer can be a child. I feel as though one automatically neglect childish ways and take and desires so that you can better take care of the real child. I do believe that one should be able to enjoy themselves every now and then but fun does not reign supreme.
If i were the parent of a teenage mother, i would offer support because i realize that everyone makes mistakes, yet embrace my grandchild as a blessing. I would try to be there in anyway possible but my child would also realize that i was not obligated to help, and they would know that it was their sole responsibility to make sure their child is accounted for in every way. As a teen i would expect the same type of support form my parents as i would give my child if they were to become a teen parent. I would expect my friends to be very supportive and even more so if the father was not present. I would expect help from the father of the child but what type of support from him would depend on our relationship. I would let him know that just because we have a child together does not mean that we have to be together. If our relationship was not a good one, it would be better if we split yet still maintained a cordial relationship for the sake of the child. If he was not a good father, nd fell under the "dead beat" category, i would be crushed but i know that i would be ok because i would have plenty of outside support from family and friends.
J'Quana Brown